Go Back to Bed

It's 8 am and already this morning I have had three "discussions" with Morgan.

First Discussion: Where is Daddy?
Morgan: (crying) Mom, where is Daddy?
Me: Where do you think he is?
Morgan: At boring work? (more crying)
Me: Yes. Now if you're going to keep crying you can go to bed.

Second Discussion: Washing Clothes
Morgan: Mom, where are you taking my clothes?
Me: (with full laundry basket in hand) I'm going downstairs to put them in the washer.
Morgan: No! No! Please, please don't wash my clothes.
Me: But if we don't wash your clothes, you'll smell like poopies and no one will want to play with you.
Morgan: (more crying)
Me: If you're going to keep crying you can go back to bed.

Third Discussion: Pineapple
Me: (I popped a piece of pineapple in my mouth from a large bowl on the kitchen table)
Morgan: Mom! That's mine! Give it back! Give it back!
Me: Pineapple is for everyone. If you're going to keep crying you can go back to bed.

Now excuse me while I don some sweatpants and pop a bon-bon. As you can see, this is paradise.