Hope

This week something very special came in the mail.

Hope.

I didn't think it was possible for hope to be tangible. Truth be told, I had convinced myself that hope was a mind game, something to wrestle with in my noggin.

Naturally, you're wanting to know what I'm talking about.

I received a blanket.

My mother hand knit a baby sized blanket. She sent me the label from the wool she bought. It's Merino Wool. Dry clean only. A bunch of other care instructions follow. But it's more than fibers strung together in intricate fashions.

First of all, it's beautiful. From a distance, it looks like a neutral colored small blanket. Up close, however, it has every imaginable color inside... reds, pinks, oranges, blues. They're all very soft colors, not garish and loud. You can't help but feel happy looking at it.

Next, it's hand made. Just for me. My, did I feel special. My mother included a note saying that as she knit it, she prayed for our future child. We're not pregnant, so she did so with, well, hope. Faith, too. She asked me to use the blanket as a sign of hope. She wanted me to know that while she could not be here, she very much wanted to be, so I should hug the blanket when I lost hope or missed her hugs. I certainly will.

Most importantly, this blanket is tangible evidence that I am not alone.

At this point, I'd like to publicly say thank you to Kris Wise and Sarah Short, who generously sent me a gift certificate for a spa treatment earlier this summer. At first, I didn't want to blog about it because I didn't want them to feel that others would expect the same. But now I see that they just wanted me to know that I'm not alone either. What great friends.

*sigh*