Valentine Greetings

We bought a bag of Sweethearts. You know, those darling, sugar packed, heart-shaped bundles of fun with short, lovey messages on them? Those.

We've found a lot of traditional messages: Love me, Kiss me, etc. And some more contemporary ones: Fax me. But tonight Dan confessed that he found a MEAN one: GO HOME. I'm BURSTING with ideas of when to use THAT one, but I'll save that tangent for later.

So there are nice candies and mean candies available, but there are no kiddo candies. There is a VOID in the marketplace, friends. But take heart: I found a way to fill this void: M&Ms allows us common folk to PERSONALIZE our candy. It's great. You're allowed 8 characters and 2 lines of text per each chocolate morsel. So if you have need to provide some alternative candy messages for a youngin', I have come up with some starter messages that I think would gain Morgan's approval:

NAG NAG NAG
I LOVE MYSELF
NO! NO! NO!
LOVE YOU, MOM
WHAT'S THAT SMELL?
I HAVE A SECRET
COOKIES! CAKE!
I WANT MONIES!
PINK PRINCESS
MINE
DAD IZ MY FAV
CHANGE MY PANTS
I LIKE WIPES
READ ME BOOKS
GIMME
SNACKS PLEASE

Now that I've got you sufficiently primed for creating your OWN Valentine messages, let me tell you how much this venture would cost: There is a minimum order of four 7 oz. bags to the tune of $47.96. That's right. For nearly $50 you can customize your own digestable message.

As a chaser to the M&Ms, may I suggest that you have a T-SHIRT made to go with it: 4 EVER POOR.